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LowComDom Performances Presents
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LowComDom Performances Presents
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Film Review - Battlefield Earth
Wow, this is bad! Really bad. You might think that Boiler Room is bad, but that's just peanuts next to Battlefield Earth!
It's the year 3000, about 1000 years after some really bad aliens took over Earth. Except they don't look like they've been here a millennium. There appears to be only one colony in Denver. Even then, the ruins of human civilization don't look that old. That aside, this story sucks!
John Travolta plays Terl, a nine foot tall asshole from another planet. He's the security chief for tall people here on Earth. Apparently, he messed with a Senator's daughter and is now stuck on Earth. Meanwhile he is being a horse's ass to anyone who crosses his path. They best way to not be abused by Terl, is to not be on the same planet as him.
Terl decides to steel some gold, but we never really know what the point of this theft will be since he's never getting off the Earth. Terl comes upon a lowly human who might just be able to help him get some gold. Terl makes the mistake of teaching this lowly human to speak the alien language, and fly alien air craft, and basically hands him the keys to taking over the planet. Yawn! This is really dull writing. This is horribly bad story telling.
As a character piece you're not going to like this. Everyone is one dimensional. Humans who are illiterate figure out how to fly Harrier Jump Jets in a few hours (Needless to say the 1000 year old jet would have a big problem with rubber seals deteriorating, but I digress.) Aliens become very stupid when humans attack, yet this is a race that has supposedly conquered many worlds.
Nothing works here. The story, characters, and special effects are all second rate. Rent Star Wars again, but don't bother with this crap!
Film Facts
Directed by Roger Christian
Released in 2000
MPAA Rating: PG-13
Reviewed by Mongo
