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Film Review - Lost World: Jurassic Park, The
I simply am not surprised. The first Jurassic Park film had little story to it, and this one has even less.
As you might remember at the end of Jurassic Park, our heroes barely escape being made into tiny cocktail weenies for a bunch of pea-brained dinos. A few years later, in Lost World, the humans decide this is sorta like Vegas and decide to double down and put their hinies into the teeth again (for what reason, I never really understood).
Along the way, we find out Jeff Goldblum is really black, and that bald white men still think that shotgun size indicates their dick size (even when they're shooting blanks.)
What this movie was all about was profit. The special effects house has perfected the art of making dinosaurs, so Spielberg decides to rake in more cash. Why? Is he pissed off because Bill Gates is richer than he is? Stevie, babe, you're a better director than this. Next time, how about a story?
Directed by Steven Spielberg
Released in 1997
MPAA Rating: PG-13
Reviewed by Mongo