The Dictionary - Z

Zebra

1. The largest size a woman can buy.

Zeppelin

1. A large blimp.
2. Still the best band for playing air guitar in one's underwear.

Zero

1. The number of times you've gotten to eat most of the pizza you ordered.

Zillion

1. The number of times you ask someone to take out the trash, then end up doing it yourself ...anyway.

Zippo Lighter

1. See Oxyacetylene Torch.

Zombie

1. A mirthless creature beloved by teenage horror movie fans and those in charge of the hiring at accounting firms.

Zoo

1. What dorms would look like if they were a little neater.
2. A pleasant and instructive wildlife park, lately denounced for depriving animals of their right to starve or be eaten alive in their natural habitats.

Zoology

1. The study of animal life. (See "Frat Boys at Homecoming")

Zymurgy's Law of Volunteer Labor

1. People are always available for work in the past tense.