Top Ten Amish Spring Break Activities

10. Drink molasses till you heave.

9. Attend a wet bonnet contest.

8. Tear a page out of the room directory and totally trash it.

7. Throw a "Keg of Buttermilk" party.

6. Blow past the Dairy Queen on a really hot Clydesdale.

5. Get a tattoo that says: "Born to Raise Barns."

4. Dare to wear a see-through smock to bed.

3. Sleep in until 6 a.m.

2. Cop a glance behind a checkout counter of the front cover of a Playboy magazine.

1. Churn butter naked.