Fly Story

There was a fly buzzing around a barn one day when he happened to find a pile of fresh cow manure. Due to the fact that it had been hours since his last meal, he flew down and began to eat. He ate and ate and ate. Finally, he decided he had eaten enough and tried to fly away. He had eaten too much though, and could not get off the ground. So he looked around wondering what to do now, he spotted a pitchfork leaning up against the barn. He climbed to the top of the handle and jumped off, thinking that once he got airborne, he would be able to take flight. Unfortunately he was wrong and dropped like a rock, splattering when he hit the floor.

The moral of the story: Never fly off the handle when you're full of shit.